Don't do the following::
- Talk about loss and hardship - it'll either scare off your date or create a type of closeness that will become either entrapping or awkward. Just don't.
- Mention your former partner(s). Creating a yardstick on the first meeting is never good - give the person you've chosen to meet up with at least a bit of a chance!
- Make jokes about your genitals and/or sexual prowess - if you're making jokes about either of these things one or both are probably worthy of a laugh.
- Mention your recent tragedies - sympathy and fun are totally separate. See above.
- Your achievements on WoW, Xbox Live or the PS3 trophy case. If your date is just "something different", then you are just "something different" and should probably stay that way.
- Detail where it all went wrong - we've all got problems. They'll become apparent in time, and more acceptable once your redeeming qualities and underlying decency (don't snigger) are accepted if things get that far.
- Profess emotional attachment and need. In fact, don't be needy. Be confident, stupid.
- Show how better you are than your mate, same sex sibling, date's former defacto/spouse/friend with benefits/miscellaneous object of desire explicitly - provoke a thought process and stop being insecure.
- Perform feats of physical domination with your date, friends nearby, random strangers and/or the police. You'll end up hurting yourself, sweating profusely, injuring yourself, injuring someone else, getting arrested or soiling your pants and releasing a fragrance.
- Challenging anyone to a contest involving shots and/or Yagerbombs. What are you -16? This statement is especially relevant if the other party is your date! Who exactly is going to make sure you both get home (no, not both to your home or their home - chances are you'll both be useless if it comes to that).
- Talking about STDs, even as jokes. See the point about former partners above.
- Impressing with money by discussion and flaunting. This reeks of desperation and will make your date either feel uncomfortable or obliged - if you want either actuality I pity you.
- Displaying pictures of family. A photo is worth a thousand words - most of them sound like "taxi" if you fill conversation space in that fashion.
- Disregard talk and/or pictures of pets - what on earth is wrong with you if you don't like animals!?!
All that said, kissing and sex on the first date is completely and totally fine.
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2 comments:
Would be a quiet date then wouldn't it?
Given that my life is a running joke and exists seemingly in a fashion limited to keeping things running, being abused constantly and serving as a warning to the rest of humanity, it is in my case.
Thus I have learned to enjoy my own company, as have the voices.
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